Our village, Our people.
I have wanted to write this blog since I started blogging. It is a tad overwhelming, I don't even know where to start. The kids and I have felt such support. Counselors, doctors, teachers, strangers at a grocery store all want to know, do you have a support system? I just smile and nod and tear up, because if I start talking about you guys I can't stop. All the sentences get jumbled and I loose my train of thought, it's very overwhelming in a good way.
I recently called my mom, here is how the conversation went.
"Hey mom do you think dad would be willing to go with me to this meeting for moral support?"
"Of course he will come with you, we will cancel our plans, do you have someone to watch the kids while you go? I'll come watch them and what about dinner, oh, leftovers? Well nobody likes those I'll just whip up the kids favorite stromboli with my special homemade sauce and cookies and treats and starbucks and be there at dinner time."
And just like that I had a person for moral support, and peace of mind knowing the kids where well taken care of and no leftovers. My family is one big beautiful bunch of lovelies. There is never a dull moment, somebody is always laughing hysterically and another crying insensately.
wants to be a police officer when he grows up. It is sweet to have a role model like this for him. It's nice to know somebody is always looking out for our safety. Ashleah also lost her dad at a young age and can identify with the kids and I in a special way. She is such a sweet soul who just shows up at a moments notice. I posted to Facebook the other day that I was having a rough time. She left what she was doing and came to sit with me through the boys graduation on the last day of school. She cried with me and squeezed the boys. She knows how to be the perfect amount of ridiculous and cry at the same time. I am incredibly thankful for both of them. Jason also put together a slide show of pictures for the calling hours. He went through probably thousands of pictures. He spent so much time on it. So many people commented on how beautiful and well-done it was. I couldn't agree more.
This post would be missing a huge piece if I didn't talk about Jo. I'm a bit clueless as to what to say. She has been such a beautiful soul through all of this. Grayson said it best, "she just gets us." She is my grocery-getter, house-cleaner, babysitter, organizer, margarita-drinking, late-night rendezvousing friend. She loved Ricky like a brother and this has been incredibly hard on her too. She has stood so strong for me. I love her like a sister. She comes and hangs out every Wednesday because she knows those days are hard. Some Wednesdays we cry, others we eat buckets of chips and salsa and sometimes we sit on the Mustard Seed rooftop patio with a green smoothie attempting to be healthy. I have often said there is no way I can ever return all the favors she has given she just waves her hand and says "pashaw it's nothing". Really. If you have a Jo in your life you are very lucky.
I recently called my mom, here is how the conversation went.
"Hey mom do you think dad would be willing to go with me to this meeting for moral support?"
"Of course he will come with you, we will cancel our plans, do you have someone to watch the kids while you go? I'll come watch them and what about dinner, oh, leftovers? Well nobody likes those I'll just whip up the kids favorite stromboli with my special homemade sauce and cookies and treats and starbucks and be there at dinner time."
And just like that I had a person for moral support, and peace of mind knowing the kids where well taken care of and no leftovers. My family is one big beautiful bunch of lovelies. There is never a dull moment, somebody is always laughing hysterically and another crying insensately.
They have scrubbed my floors and toilets, (and lets be real, this is no easy task when 3 boys live in the house) cleaned the garage, played soccer with the boys, fixed things in my house, mowed my lawn, loved on my kids when I couldn't think straight, they have sat and cried with us or brought margaritas or wine or juice boxes. I am so thankful for them, this list could go on and on. This is the last family picture we took, left to right is Chris, Joel, Noah, James, Darci, Jeremy, Scott, Suzzannah, Mom, Dad, Kat, Gia, Charlie, Dan, Ivan, Oakley, Kimby, Aaron, me, Ricky, Westin, Isabelle, Tony and Gray. I am blessed.
These people also hold a special place in my heart. Just look at those lovely faces. Ricky and I met them in a college group around 10 years ago through church. We have been through a lot of life-change together, I count them as some of my closest friends. They were the ones who took care of most of the logistical things after Ricky passed. Funeral plans, coordinating meal calendars, a go-fund me account, they wrote the obituary (really who has the strength to write one of those) they took time off from work and just sat with our family. Every Friday Joel and Monika open their home up to our people to hang out and Joel schools the boys in mario kart and pokemon. It has been nice to have a safe place to go and just be us, because thats about all I can muster right now. I love you Joel, Tim, Amanda, Nichole and Monika!
Ricky's best friend Jason and his wife Ashleah have also been super helpful in this season. Jason is a police officer for the city of Akron. He often swings by while on patrol and hangs out with the kids. When he first started stopping by all the neighbors would come to the door curiously. Now they don't bat an eye and Tony dances in the street anytime he sees a patrol car pulling down our street. I am trying to teach him this isn't the wisest plan... Tony
This post would be missing a huge piece if I didn't talk about Jo. I'm a bit clueless as to what to say. She has been such a beautiful soul through all of this. Grayson said it best, "she just gets us." She is my grocery-getter, house-cleaner, babysitter, organizer, margarita-drinking, late-night rendezvousing friend. She loved Ricky like a brother and this has been incredibly hard on her too. She has stood so strong for me. I love her like a sister. She comes and hangs out every Wednesday because she knows those days are hard. Some Wednesdays we cry, others we eat buckets of chips and salsa and sometimes we sit on the Mustard Seed rooftop patio with a green smoothie attempting to be healthy. I have often said there is no way I can ever return all the favors she has given she just waves her hand and says "pashaw it's nothing". Really. If you have a Jo in your life you are very lucky.
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| Here we are teaching Iz about margaritas. |
Last but far from least I want to talk about my church. Recently Grace Church won "Church of the Year". Like for real, my immediate thought was what would Jesus think about an award called church of the year. Wouldn't He be pretty frustrated about that? Wasn't His goal to feed the hungry, take care of the sick, come alongside those who were down on their luck and bring hope? What is this ridiculous church of the year business. And then I realized (with great humiliation) this is exactly what my church is about. They seek to share Jesus with everyone, in a very physical way. Whether it is volunteering in after school programs, visiting the sick, hanging out with refugees, or offering classes to help people understand the Bible better. Grace wants to be the hands and feet of Jesus. They have done this in such a tangible way for our family. Babysitting, yard work, meals (I believe I have meals coming through August, I mean come-on!) cards, practical gifts, you name it and God's people from my church are here picking up pieces.This was the first life group we attended.
This is a picture of a picture. I know it's crummy. Each of these people hold a special place in my heart. One of them went on to be a pastor at Grace. He was the one who did Ricky's funeral, Ricky counted him as one of his closest friends. His wife sends me the most special texts and memories of Ricky on a regular basis. One of them brings me Swensons regularly, everyone needs one of those friends. One of them is giving Grayson piano lessons, mentoring him and teaching him be a worship leader, this is invaluable to us. One of them brought us firewood, another took the boys to a Cavs game recently. So.many.things. They are people who want to serve in whatever way there is a need. They are doing what the Bible says.
"Don't fool yourself into thinking that you are a listener when you are anything but, letting the Word go in one ear and out the other. ACT ON WHAT YOU HERE! Those who hear and don't act are like those who glance in a mirror, walk away and 2 minutes later have no idea who they are, what they look like. But whoever catches a glimpse of the revealed counsel of God (the free life!) even out of the corner of his eye and sticks with it, is no distracted scatterbrain but a man or woman of action. That person will find delight and affirmation in the action. Anyone who sets himself up as "religious" by talking a good game is self-deceived. This kind of religion is hot air and only hot air. Real religion, the kind that passes muster before God the Father, is the kind that passes muster before God the Father, is this: Reach out to the homeless and loveless in their plight, and guard against corruption from the godless world."-James 1:22-27
If you count yourself a Christian I challenge you to go serve. Serve wherever God has you or Uganda..I don't care. It is a beautiful thing to give to others. Recently I have been on the receiving end, it's a little uncomfortable but oh-so-nice. I'm so thankful for all the amazing people who surround us. I have a thank you list a mile long. I intend to get to it one day. But until then could this be the biggest thank you letter ever? Lots of love friends.
